I pray that during these trying times you also see your inability to do anything on your own, and give your trust to God’s ability to strengthen you.
For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Cor. 12:10
Today it really feels like I will never have victory over my binge eating, harmony in my relationships or control over my finances. It’s hard to connect with my faith. I’m just so tired and frustrated.
Have you ever felt this way? At times like this, it’s hard for me to stay positive or remember any of the coping techniques, affirmations or prayers that I know so well… much less do them.
What do you do when you don’t even seem to have the energy to use the tools that you know with a certainty will move you to a better place?
Prayer is the last thing I want to do, but I’m so grateful that I had the wherewithal to grab for a favorite book that always turns me around. It’s called “Humility” and it’s by Andrew Murray. His words are like medicine healing my soul.
The author defines humility as “simply the disposition that prepares the soul for living in trust.” Wow!! On page 85 it says, “Place yourself before God in your helplessness; consent to the fact that you are powerless to slay yourself; give yourself in patient and trustful surrender to God. Accept every humiliation; look upon it and every person” (and here I’ll add, and every piece of food) “who tries to trouble you as a means of grace to humble you.”
He reminds me that in my own flesh, I am powerless to change myself. These “lapses” are meant to bring me to an even stronger need and expectation from God. I am to look upon every one of these dark moments as a way to experience God’s grace, as an opportunity to come to the end of myself and to allow the start of God’s work in my life.
I pray that during these trying times you also see your inability to do anything on your own, and give your trust to God’s ability to strengthen you.
So what are the next steps?
- If you’re in the midst of binging, then take the focus off yourself and your weakness and put the focus on God — He promises us that His grace is sufficient. (2 Cor. 12:9)
- Every day, remind yourself of your emptiness, and acknowledge your dependence on God