Do you really want to lose weight or just ‘kinda’ want it?

The other day one of my son’s soccer coaches sent out a 3-page email telling the boys that they did not want success bad enough. At first I was offended that a coach would be so hard on 14 year old boys but after thinking about it, he was 100% right.

Here’s a line from his email, “I am here to tell you guys that most of you say you want to be successful but you don’t want it bad, you just kinda want it.” Harsh huh, but sometimes, a harsh (but loving) word is just what you need, especially if like the boys – you’ve not been giving it your all. Could this be where you are on your weight releasing journey right now?

Maybe you’ve been praying, been working out, eating healthy but if you’re honest with yourself, you have not 100% fully committed yourself to the process. Something has been holding you back from doing what you KNOW you need to do.

Please hear me, this is not a message to make you feel bad. Feeling bad is another ploy of the enemy to take you out of the game. When you know better, do better, and if you can’t do better then take the necessary steps to learn what you need to do in order to do better next time. This message is so that you do not waste another day living in frustration, fear, doubt, guilt and shame.

The coach’s email then encouraged the boys to identify what’s holding them back and address it. His parting words were, “Whether you take action or not, that’s on you.”

Ouch and amen! Do you know what’s holding you back from taking action? In my almost 30 years of helping people to reach their goals, I’ve identified 4 areas that hold people back from reaching their weight loss goals. See which one(s) might be stopping you and then commit to taking action today.

These areas are all inter-related – each one affects the other but start with and resolve the one that’s affecting you most before you move on to the next one. Stay focused on the area that’ll have the biggest impact on your weight releasing.


4 Areas that Usually Hold People Back From Reaching Their Goal


Physical – You’re stopped by the (perceived) pain of either exercising or of giving up foods.

Other Characteristics-You are not exercising most days each week and you’re not tracking your food intake or following your meal plan.


  • get a workout buddy
  • join a gym or group program
  • accountability
  • track your food on my fitness pal
  • understand your ‘why’
  • hire a personal trainer


Our Haven program is great way to get you in action and keep you accountable to so that you can stick to your goals.


Spiritual – You’re stopped by your own will. You have a hard time trusting God, yourself and others so you keep doing things the way you think they should be done instead of how God has directed you or wants to direct you.

Other Characteristics –

  • You keep taking back the reigns every time you turn your health and weight loss program over to God.
  • Your prayer life is sporadic.
  • You consistently give in to over-eating or bingeing.


  • make repenting and submitting a daily practice
  • take a bible study course on submitting
  • join a prayer and/or support group
  • pray as soon as you wake up and before each meal

Our 5 Steps to Christian Weight Loss program is great at teaching you how your weight releasing journey is really a spiritual journey.


Emotional – You’re stopped by your emotions. They lead your feelings, moods and habits.

Other Characteristics –

  • Your eating is fueled by your moods and not what your body needs.
  • You’re not able to resist food cravings.
  • You struggle with feelings of guilt, shame, doubt and fear.


  • Understand the emotions that compel you to eat and develop a systematic approach to your health that is not dependent on your feelings (try our 5 Step to Christian Weight Loss to help with this)
  • Learn the type of foods to eat to curb sweet cravings
  • Learn how to get in tune with what your body’s telling you

Mental – You let your mind talk you out of doing what you know is right.

Other Characteristics –

  • Your inconsistent with doing what you need to do
  • You talk yourself out of taking action
  • Your limiting beliefs continually take you out of the game and tell you that you can’t do it.
  • You’re sporadic in your program— it often feels like you take 1 step forward and 2 steps bac


  • Commit to getting to the root of what’s keeping you stuck
  • Keep a journal to get conscious of your negative self talk
  • Commit to building your self-esteem
  • Begin reciting positive affirmations
  • evaluate all the areas in your life that are not positive influences
  • Try new things (outdoor adventure)
  • Seek out professional advice

Our Healthy by Design programs have been developed to identify all of these areas. Whether it’s our 21 Day Challenge, our 5 Steps to Christian Weight Loss program or our Haven community, we address the physical, spiritual, mental and emotional issues associate with releasing weight.

If you’re not sure where to start, try getting my book, ‘Healthy by Design: Weight Loss, God’s Way’ along with the complimentary 21 Day Challenge and we’ll direct you from there.

If you really want ‘it’ then fully commit yourself to the process starting today. You CAN do it!





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