What is an adopted identity?
Many of us have adopted identities that now rule our lives. Adopting identities means that we have taken on certain roles other than who God has designed as to be, such as being a perfectionist, the people-pleaser or the drama-queen (or king).
- This identity feels better than our real life
- This identity gives us more attention (whether negative or positive)
- There is some type of pay-off or reward from this identity
Though it might seem like a better way to live. This identity robs us of the fulfilling life that God has truly called us to live.
Where did these identities come from?
At some point in our lives we experienced an event that had a major impact on our belief system. We may have been rewarded for an action or conversely may have been reprimanded for something. It elicited certain feelings in us that from that point on we continually yearned for. These feelings include feeling wanted, loved, nurtured, seen or appreciated. This belief that if we needed to continue to replicate that experience to regain that feeling, had such an impact on our perception that we then began to do, say and act in a way that gave us more of that feeling.
From that moment on, we begin to live our lives always looking to fulfill those desires. We seek out people who will confirm and affirm that pattern of behaviour.
In my last post, I talked about the people-pleaser identity and how it can keep you from losing weight (among other goals).
People-pleasers are always helping, fixing, apologizing, and serving so much so that they neglect their own needs. Like all the other identities, our trues selves, our true feelings, our true needs are never expressed and many times we don’t even know ourselves what we need.
How do you Change?
These identities have come from a faulty belief system about ourselves. At the root of it is fear. They usually stem from a fear of rejection, a fear of success; fear of failure; or a fear of trust/control.
Anchoring your beliefs on the Word of God
It should be no coincidence that the word ‘fear not’ is the most repeated command in the Bible.
God would never command us to do something that he has not enabled us to do.
To overcome every challenge that we face, God wants us to get to the root of our fears. He wants us to be the people and live the life that He has called us to live.
“He said to them, “Do you bring in a lamp to put it under a bowl or a bed? Instead, don’t you put it on its stand?
To begin to take back your God given identity, you must first get to the root of your fears. Pray and ask God to show you what is at the root. He will show you if you earnestly seek Him.
Then the process of letting-go begins. This is where much of the work will take place because you’re essentially noticing thoughts, patterns and behaviours in yourself that were subconscious. You are now exposing them to light.
As I shared in the last post, you will begin to let go of this old identity and begin thinking, acting and talking differently. The great news is that you can do it and you will do it with God’s help.
I pray for your success and for the new breakthroughs you will experience as a result of living out your God-given identity.
Until Next Time,
For a step-by-step guide on how to get to the root of your weight loss struggles, check out our newly released on-line course, 5 Steps to Christian Weight Loss.
We’re also hosting a free webinar this Monday, June 16th that will go into more detail about this very topic. It’s called ‘Is Your Identity keeping you from Achieving Your Healthy Weight?’